Dark Cocoa and Roasted Kumquat Egg-Free Ice Cream

It is hard to not be taken in by the kumquat.  So small and vibrantly hued, they are just begging to thrown in your bag and carried home and loved.

Last time I fell for their charms, I wasn't enamored.  It wasn't a bad experience, but there are so many other foods I love with so much more fervor.

So you would think I would just leave things well enough alone and bypass them next time I encountered them.

You would think that.  But that is absolutely not what happened.  Next time I saw them, I found myself stuffing them by the fistful into my bag.  I knew logically that this wasn't the best idea in life.  But emotionally I was attached.

Since I'm impetuous and the opposite of rational, these adorable little fruits were indeed coming home with me.  Again.

After sitting in the fridge for a few days (weeks?), I knew the time had come to finally do something - anything - with the little guys.  I've always liked the taste, but not the way they feel in your mouth.  So I tried to do something about that issue - and I pureed them after roasting them, turning them into a cocoa ice cream.  And now I'm absolutely falling in love.

Ingredients
1 cup halved kumquats
1-2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
2 cups heavy cream
1 cup whole milk
3/4 cup dark cocoa powder
2/3 cup sugar
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1/8 teaspoon almond extract

Instructions
For the kumquats:  Heat oven to 400.  Toss the kumquats with the oil.  Spread on baking sheet and roast for about 20 minutes, until they have softened and are brown on the bottom.  Let cool.

For the ice cream: Put the kumquats in a large bowl.  Add the cream and milk.  Use an immersion blender to blend the kumquats into the liquid.  Stir in cocoa powder, sugar, and the extracts.  Pour into the ice cream maker and churn according to manufacturer's directions.  Serve immediately.  If freezing, you may find it it best to let the ice cream set out for a bit before serving.

Date and Sesame Chocolate Bars

In Go Dog Go, there are two characters that we meet a few times throughout the book. A girl dog dons a perfectly acceptable hat and asks the boy dog if he likes her hat. He says no, and then they say their goodbyes. This happens three times, with three different hats. But the fourth time they meet is different. He finally likes her hat, and afterwards, the two drive off into the sunset together. And it isn't just any hat. It is an extravagant, an outlandish, a whimsical hat.
Objects hanging from the hat include:
- a fish
- a spider
- candy canes
- pinwheels
- a potted flower
- flag celebrating the letter "Z"
- a mouse

Though I find this to be a horrid example of interpersonal relations, this is how I feel about dried fruit. Show me some perfectly acceptable, perfectly lovely dried cranberries or cherries or grapes and I will say no, I do not like that hat. But mix the dried fruit with chocolate and more chocolate and some spices and sesame seeds and sesame paste, then finally, finally - I will like that hat.

For more snack ideas check out Cooking Light's slideshow of healthy snacks.  So much deliciousness!

Ingredients
1 cup pitted dates, chopped roughly
1 tablespoon tahini
1/2 teaspoon honey
1 1/2 tablespoons dark cocoa powder
pinch cardamom
pinch cinnamon
pinch kosher salt
1 tablespoon roasted sesame seeds
1-2 tablespoons mini chocolate chips
fleur de sel, for sprinkling

Instructions
Place the dates, tahini, honey and cocoa powder in the bowl of a food processor.  Pulse.  Add in the sesame seeds,  and chocolate chips and pulse again.  Take the mixture in your hands (it may help to spray them with a cooking spray) and work it into a sort of "dough."  Push the mixture firmly into a square-shaped, sandwich-size Tupperware-type container.  Cut into bars.  Sprinkle the top of the bars with fleur de sel.  I like to keep these bars in the fridge.

Mango Camembert Quesadilla with Vanilla and Honey Tangerine Dip

5 years ago, I fell in love.  It was with a red dress.  The most perfect red dress in the world.

After finding my soul mate, I just assumed we would grow old together.  I mean, I guess I didn't really expect to be like 85 and still wearing it.  Okay, fine, a small but irrational part of me hoped to be 85 and rocking some long silver hair and the dress.  But the reasonable part of my brain expected at least a solid decade together. Ten years of museums and restaurants and street fairs and barbecues and trips to the grocery store to experience with each other.

It has recently come to my attention that this red dress is no longer perfect.  Instead of an expanse of flawless red, it is now red with greyish black gunk on the bottom.  It is as though I decided to drag the dress in a vat of gasoline.

I have no idea how it got there.  Nor do I know what the stain is.  I have tried all the stain removal tricks I can find.  But it won't budge.  I will probably take it to a cleaner to see if they can work some magic, but I'm not optimistic.

I have started to mourn the loss.  The loss of the dress.  The loss of our years together.

There isn't much that can fill this void.  But food helps.  Food all cheesy and fruity, and with a honey-tangerine dip.

Though our time together was perhaps cut short, I will always carry its spirit with me. I just know it would love this quesadilla.

Adapted from Cooking Light's Peach and Brie Quesadilla

Ingredients
2 tablespoons honey
2 tablespoons tangerine juice
1/2 teaspoon tangerine zest
1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract

1 scallion, chopped
4 ounces Camembert cheese, thinly sliced
1 cup sliced mango
4 flour tortillas
canola oil, for cooking

Instructions
To make the honey dipping sauce:
In a small bowl, mix the honey, tangerine juice, tangerine zest, and the vanilla extract together.  Set aside.

To assemble the quesadillas:
Take the flour tortilla and put some chopped scallions, some mango, and a slice of Camembert on half of the tortilla.  Once all your ingredients are in, fold the tortilla. Heat canola oil (about a tablespoon) in a cast iron skillet. Place the quesadillas in two at a time. Once a side has a nice golden brown color, flip it over. Once both sides are golden brown, take off heat and serve with the honey tangerine dipping sauce.

Almost Instant Banana, Chocolate, and Peanut Butter "Pudding"

Ugh, I hate those recipes that pretend to be one thing but in reality are nothing like it.  I'm looking at you pureed cauliflower masquerading as fettucine alfredo.

Afterwards, you are all sad and regretful because you ate something that was not delicious.  Unless you are like Anton Ego, living the philosophy of  "If I don't love it, I don't swallow."  In which case you are still hungry.

It occurs to you that you should have just made the real thing - with you know, cream and butter and cheese - then maybe just stuff a handful of spinach in your face and be done with it.

It is hard for me to tell if I am breaking my own rule.  Maybe this really is nothing like pudding.  But calling it a "pudding-like substance" doesn't exactly flow.  And maybe I hate myself a bit for even posting this.

But even if this is not pudding, but technically a "pudding-like substance," I did at least convince the toddler that this was a dessert - something to demand, to crave.  He can be a tough crowd, a pint-sized but nonetheless fervent subscriber to Anton Ego's food philosophy .  Case in point - never serve this child homemade biscuits that are not fresh from the oven - lest one offend his his delicate sensibilities.

Ingredients
1 frozen banana
1 banana
1 1/2 tablespoons dark cocoa powder
1 tablespoon natural peanut butter
pinch freshly grated nutmeg
pinch of cinnamon (roasted Saigon cinnamon works really well)
pinch sea salt

Instructions
Put everything into a bowl and blend with an immersion blender.  Alternatively, put everything in a blender to blend.  That's it!

Homemade Cashew Butter

My mind is is filled with clouds.  Some are stratus clouds, keeping running mental lists of groceries, chores and projects to complete, activities to do with Max.

Some are more like the wispy cirrus kind, with nascent, fleeting thoughts.  The sliver of a Max story to remember to tell Seth.  The name of the book I absolutely need to read. Ohh my god, I need a muffin.  The stream of consciousness stuff.

Some are puffy cumulus clouds, obsessing about watching the next episode of West Wing (yes, we are like a decade late to this), or what I want to eat for dinner.  Or exactly what kind of sweet treat I'm in the mood for (we've all experienced the crushing disappointment of eating cookies when really, you need some ice cream).  There are probably a lot of food clouds floating around.  Okay, there are DEFINITELY lots of food clouds.

Then there are the nimbus clouds, brooding over climate change and foolhardy austerity measures.   Wondering what it all means when someone who was all about Gap Dream grew up into someone more like a Gap Om. Fretting about growing income inequality and finances.  Worrying that WE ALL ARE JUST CHARACTERS in a book (never again will Pat the Bunny and Goodnight Moon be the same).  Grieving over the cancellation of Don't Trust the B in Apt 23 (Dawson forever!!), etc.

With all the clouds swirling around, I can sometimes be oblivious to things going on around me.  The physical world.  The tangible.

Until the physical finally brushes up against me.  Or, I brush up against it.

Like the other night. When my hairbrush went up against the largest knot I have ever had the joy (dismay) of experiencing. Just hanging there. All tangled and big. Did I mention tangled?  Bringing up the extremely pressing questions of "how long has this been there" and "how did I not notice this before??!??" Errands, playground trips, all likely done by the girl with the giant knot in her hair.

This cloudy world I inhabit seems to also have obscured the deliciousness of cashews.  I've always liked them, but never did I realize how wonderful they are.  It is more than just like - it is love.  I have begun to make up for lost time by throwing them in everything that remotely appears to be a good match for them.  Like this chicken salad, or these meringues.  And now they have been turned into cashew butter.  It's got a flavor that will part the clouds any day.

Ingredients
10 ounces roasted and salted cashews
2 1/2 teaspoons wild dandelion honey
2 tablespoons walnut or other nut oil
2 tablespoons canola oil (feel free to use more if needed)
pinch kosher salt

Instructions
Run the cashews in a food processor until very fine.  Add in the honey and walnut oil and process until everything comes together (this may take a bit, just be patient).  Slowly add in the canola oil and process until the mixture reaches your desired consistency.  I made mine on the thick side, as it would work better in a recipe I was using it in.  Add kosher salt to taste.

Whale-Shaped Crackers with Cheddar and Nori, an Ode to the Whale

In terms of cetacean appreciation, dolphins get the glory.  They are so cute and friendly and sleek.  Jumping out of the water to show off their spins and spyhops.  Equipped with a fancy echolocation system to navigate.  And can even come in the color pink, a fact that Max is super in love with.  Okay okay, dolphins are really awesome.  And yes, I'm pretty taken with the pink dolphins as well.

But whales are awesome too.  This weekend is the start of the Festival of Whales here in Dana Point, marking the migration of the gray whale (though blue whales have strangely been spotted recently as well).  We are totally obsessed with both whales and the festival.  Like, lets cut whale shapes out of construction paper and string them together to make banners to hang up kind of obsessed.  Like, lets turn our food into whale-shapes obsessed.  Like, watching Blue Planet over and over and over again obsessed.  I've even done some research into the gray whale's diet, pondering ways to incorporate  it into whale-party food.  I'm such a dork.

All lumpy and big and grungy, they might not be as chic and beautiful as their dolphin relatives, but they are just as lovable. From the narwhal, an animal about which I'm half-convinced doesn't actually exist but is just a figment of someone's imagination...to the humpbacks with their renowned singing and their own version of pop music...and to the blue whales, being the biggest living thing EVER - the whale, in all its diversity, is due for some love.  So this is our ode.  Our ode to the whale (see previously, ode to ground beef).

Last year, we made these.  In celebration of our devotion to this cetacean and our town's festival.  This year we made crackers - a sonnet expressing our love, but in an edible form.  Whole wheat, buttery, sesame seed filled crackers topped with cheese and a sprinkling of nori goma furikake.  Seth introduced this combination of cracker, cheddar, and the nori, and we have been hooked ever since.  The cheese can also be seen as an homage to our pure and utter cheesiness. I wasn't kidding about being a dork.

Ingredients
3 cups white whole wheat flour
1/4 cup roasted sesame seeds
1 tablespoon baking powder
1 teaspoon kosher salt
1/8 teaspoon cayenne pepper
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1/2 cup cold butter, cut into small pieces
1 - 2 cups ice water
whale shaped cookie cutter
good quality cheddar, sliced
nori goma furikake

Instructions
In a mixing bowl, whisk flour, sesame, baking powder, salt, and peppers.  Rub the butter into the flour using your hands or pastry cutter, until the mixture looks like coarse sand.  In the bowl of a stand mixer, very gradually, and on low speed, add the cold water, stopping once a dough forms.  You want the mixture to hold together and to no longer be dry. Take half the mixture and put in fridge.  Roll out the other half on a silpat or parchment until about 1/8 to 1/4 inch thick.  Use the cookie cutter to make whale shapes.  Sprinkle with just a bit of fleur de sel and place in 375 degree oven for 10-15 minutes, until golden and crisp.  Repeat with the rest of the dough.  To serve, top with a slice of cheddar and a sprinkle of nori.

Chocolate and Olive Oil Crostini

A setting or rising sun is one of those sights that we, as a species, love to behold.  So colorful and and epic and majestic, it inspires a sense of wonder and awe.  Unless you are a certain two year old.  The sun is totally old news, apparently, for him.  A sunset, though, is exciting for one and only one reason - it is a harbinger of the moon!  Our little guy is quite taken with the moon, and has a deep love for just sitting outside and gazing up excitedly at it.  Moon watching, actually, can begin as early as 3 or 4 pm. That's when we start to think the moon is out.  So we have to go outside and check if it can be seen.  As expected, it usually is not visible at that time.  So we keep checking again and again and again.  And eventually, that wonderful moon of ours does indeed make an appearance (though I'm not sure how he will take the news that the moon goes through a "new moon" phase).  And when that happens, he scoots some chairs out to the deck and demands a moon watching companion. If Max was running the show, one would do nothing but moon watch from 4 pm until bedtime.  But, as you can imagine, that leaves no time to do things like, I don't know, make dinner.  So compromises are made.  Full on moon watching begins after dinner once the dishes have been cleaned up.  We go to the deck, bundle up, sit on on the chairs that Max so helpfully brought outside, and eat a snack while gazing up at the moon. These crostini with a chocolate and olive oil drizzle, mint leaves, coconut flakes, and vanilla salt make for a fun moon watching snack.  Packed onto a tray and taken outside, it is a delicious companion to celestial observations. And of course, it can be eaten indoors as well.

Ingredients
3.5 ounces good quality chocolate ( I used a Lindt 70% cacao bar)
1/4  cup plus 1 tablespoon olive oil, divided
1 baguette, sliced
vanilla salt
white pepper
1/3 cup chopped mint leaves
1/3 cup coconut flakes

Instructions
Heat oven to 375.  Place the baguette slices on a baking sheet (I used a Silpat to line mine).  Pour 1/4 cup olive oil in a bowl, and brush the oil on each slice.  Sprinkle a bit of vanilla salt and pepper on each.  Bake for 8-10 minutes or until golden-brown.

Place the chocolate bar (chopped) and 1 tablespoon of olive oil in a small microwaveable bowl. Carefully melt the chocolate and olive oil together (about 30 seconds).  Stir the mixture.

Have fun with these - drizzle the chocolate and olive oil on the crostini, or use it as a dip.  Sprinkle more vanilla salt on top, if desired. Or throw on some mint leaves and/or coconut flakes.  Whatever floats your boat!

Baked Flour Tortilla Chips, Crisp and Flaky

Remember those chips in the background of this post?  We loved them so much, we thought we'd give them their very own shiny post.  These chips are all about simplicity.  Wedges of flour tortillas are coated in canola oil and sprinkled with salt, then tossed on a pan to get all crisped up in the oven.  That is all it takes to get some crispy, flaky baked chips.  It's a great, healthy alternative to fried tortilla chips, and we honestly think they taste better too, with the right tortillas.  You just don't get that flakiness with deep frying.  Oh, and a word to the wise... do not use gluten free spinach tortillas you find at Whole Foods just because they sound cool.  They do not taste good.  At all.  Just use Mission flour tortillas...

Ingredients
4 flour tortillas (I like using Mission brand tortillas)
1 tablespoon canola oil
1 teaspoon kosher salt

Instructions
Heat oven to 350.  Cut each tortilla into 8 wedges, like a pie.  Place in large bowl.  Drizzle with oil and salt.  Using tongs, coat each wedge with the oil and salt.  Place the wedges carefully on two baking sheets (you don't want them stacked on top of each other), and place them in the over for 15-20 minutes, or until golden brown and crispy.

"Be Quiet" Baby Fudge

In the book One Hungry Monster, the protagonist is plagued by…well…hungry monsters.  To ward them off, he gives them 10 jars of peanut butter.  He gives it without jam, because he wants “every monster mouth shut tighter than a clam.”  We apply the same principle to our own little monster, Max.  These chewy energy bites are perfect for those super whiny times.  Like when you and your best friend from college live on opposite sides of the country and have been playing phone tag for months.  And just when you finally get a hold of each other, he starts getting upset for some ridiculously minor reason.  Bingo.  "Be quiet" baby fudge to the rescue.  It does double quiet duty actually – not only when he eats it, but also when he helps make it, carefully dumping each ingredient into the bowl with little toddler concentration-face… until he gets too grabby with the chocolate chips.

Ingredients 
1 cup old fashioned whole wheat oatmeal
½ cup natural peanut butter
1/3 cup honey
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
¼ cup ground almonds
¼ cup ground flax seeds
½ cup chocolate chips
pinch salt
pinch ground cinnamon
pinch ground cardamom

Instruction 
Place all the ingredients into a large bowl.  Use your hands to mix everything all together.  Feel free to use a wooden spoon, but I think it gets mixed up better when done by hand.  I like to mush the “dough” into a square Tupperware container.  Refrigerate for at least an hour, then cut into square bites.  Store in the fridge.

Homemade Cheez-Its

After seeing these on Dara’s blog, Gen Y Foodie, I was smitten.  We needed to make them.  But instead of being all responsible and healthy with the olive oil and flax seeds, I went with good old butter.  We love butter.  We love Julia Child’s "Mastering the Art of French Cooking" for that reason.  So back to the cheez-its – It is exciting for some reason to make a homemade version of packaged food item.  Especially in this case, the buttery, cheesy crackers emerging fresh from the oven makes for such a lovely snack.  Now Seth likes to destroy this delicate harmony of the home-baked cheddar cracker by actually dipping them in this ridiculous store bought cheese dip.  If you notice, it isn’t even packaged in a jar.  It is a tin can that you open like a can of cat food.  Super classy.  He swears by it.  He claims that because the cheez-its taste so strongly like cheese, it helps to dip them into something that doesn’t taste anything like cheese… like pre-packaged cheese dip… While this is the dip he grew up with, and sometimes you just can’t fight nostalgia, I think we’d both agree that these crackers taste great with almost any dip.

Ingredients
1 cup whole wheat flour
8 ounces extra sharp cheddar cheese, coarsely grated
½ teaspoon kosher salt, plus more for sprinkling on top
¼ teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
¼ teaspoon paprika
¼ teaspoon powdered mustard
¼ teaspoon onion powder
4 tablespoons cold unsalted butter, cut into tiny pieces
6 – 8 tablespoons ice water

Instructions
In a small bowl, mix together ½ teaspoon kosher salt, pepper, paprika, powdered mustard, and onion powder.  In a medium bowl, mix together flour, cheddar, and the seasoning mix.  Add the pieces of butter and using your fingers work the butter with the flour mixture until it resembles coarse crumble.  Add 6 tablespoons ice water, adding more if needed for the dough to come together.  You might want to use your hands to work the dough into a large ball.  Refrigerate for 1 hour.  Heat oven to 350.  I like to roll the dough out on a Silpat or parchment paper cut to fit a baking sheet to get the right size thickness (about 1/8 inch), and then transfer the Silpat or parchment to a baking sheet. If you aren’t using these, the dough should be rolled out to roughly fit a baking sheet.  Use a pizza cutter or fluted pastry wheel (gives that nice deckled edge) to cut the dough into squares.  It helps to use a ruler to evenly space out the cuts.  Use a chopstick to make the classic hole in the center that store-bought cheez-its have.  Sprinkle more kosher salt on top then bake for about 20 minutes.  You want the crackers to be crisp, but not burnt; you may wish to remove the outer couple rows, then put the pan back in and finish the inner rows.  Once they are done, use the same pizza cutter or fluted pastry wheel (lined up with your previous cuts) to separate the crackers fully.

Kale Chips with Parmesan Cheese and Garlic

Oh, kale.  Kale is such a vain vegetable.  It loves nothing more than jumping into the oven to get all crispy and chip-like.  Kale likes partaking in this act because it turns kale into a beloved food.  Once kale emerges from the oven all crisped up and full of flavorings, even all those people who say they don’t like kale end up liking it.  And kale just wants to be liked.  

Ingredients 
1 bunch curly kale
1/3 cup grated Parmesan cheese
¼ teaspoon kosher salt
1/8 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
3 cloves garlic, minced
2 teaspoons fresh lemon juice
1 tablespoon olive oil

Instructions
Heat oven to 325 degrees.  Line a baking sheet with parchment paper or a Silpat for easy cleanup.  Chop the leaves of the kale into medium-sized pieces.  Wash and dry thoroughly, then place in a large bowl for mixing.  In a small bowl, whisk Parmesan cheese, kosher salt, black pepper, and garlic.  In another small bowl, mix the lemon juice and olive oil.  Drizzle the lemon juice and olive oil mixture over the kale in the large bowl.  Use tongs to help coat all the pieces.  Then sprinkle the Parmesan cheese mixture, and use tongs to help coat the pieces with the mixture.  Bake in the oven for about 12-15 minutes.  You want the pieces to be brown and crispy, but not burnt.  I sometimes remove pieces as they become the desired crispness and let some of the less crispy ones stay in the oven longer.

Homemade Popcorn

We have lived many years without tasting the amazingness that is homemade popcorn.  Jenn was actually convinced she didn’t like popcorn.  Eventually, we got around to making some old fashioned popcorn, cooked on the stove and popped in a big ol pot.  Now even Jenn is hooked on it.  It’s all about having total control of the spices, herbs, and melty stuff you mix in.  When making it on the stove is so easy, economical, and delicious, we can’t understand why anyone would buy special gadgets or microwave bags.  Here is one of our favorite versions.  Popcorn, oh yea!  

Ingredients                                                                                                   

1/8 cup corn oil – or enough to coat the bottom of the pot you are using

¼ cup popcorn kernels

2 tablespoons butter, melted

2 tablespoons parmesan cheese, grated

1/8 teaspoon sea salt

1/8 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

1/8 teaspoon seasoned salt – we like using Johnny’s seasoning salt

1/8 teaspoon garlic powder

1/8 teaspoon crushed red pepper

Instructions

Heat the oil in a large pot over medium heat.  Add three kernels of popcorn and cover pot with lid.  Once those have popped, add the ¼ cup of kernels.  Shake the pot frequently.  Once the popping has stopped, turn off heat, add the butter, cheese, and seasonings, and stir well to mix.  That's it.